The Rules

"I'm a doctor, not a coal miner."
"I'm a doctor, not an escalator."
"I'm a doctor, not a bricklayer."
"I'm a doctor, not an engineer."
"I'm a doctor, not a mechanic."
"I'm a doctor, not a Moon Shuttle Conductor."
"I'm a doctor, not a psychiatrist."

Any other ideas?

THE UNOFFICIAL USS FARPOINT RULES FOR NERF VOLLEYBALL

1. One hand only at a time, please.
2. Ricochets are playable. (This includes cars, barbecues, picnic tables, the ground and other people's faces. Don't worry, it's a Nerf!)
3. Shoving people into the bushes to be devoured by Slime Devils or Killer Tribbles is most definately frowned upon.
4. A bonus point is awarded for anybody who manages to take out an item of food in the general region. 5 pts. for cakes.
5. Cheap shots at the Captain must involve a comment about blushing or garage sales.
6. Cheap shots aimed at Don D. must refer to food.
7. Cheap shots aimed at Jerry B. can be about anything.
8. All other cheap shots are allowed. (Of course.)
9. There is no such thing as an innocent bystander in this game.
10. No implements of death are allowed. (Knives, Forks, Spoons, Plastic Bowls, Coolers, Bad Puns, etc.)
11. Everybody else is welcome to join in. (At their own risk)

You can tell the sunburn got to my head, can't you? (;-)

Before I go any further- I just want to say something before I get myself into really deep trouble. When I write these things, I will sometimes take a shot at somebody. (For example, rules 5,6,7 above.) I just want to say I only intend it in good fun, and I don't mean any offense. I apologize in advance if I have insulted anybody, and I expect to be properly chastised in that event. Under no circumstances should anybody else be blamed except me. This applies to anything I write. If you have problems with it, let me know!!